YES, I'VE BEEN AVOIDING YOU

I have a confession.  For the past 48 hours, I have been avoiding all of you.  Text messages, emails and Facebook posts.  You all saw I was getting my scan results yesterday and then I was back at the hospital today.

Truth is my scan results were not that great.  First, my lung scans were GREAT!!  Slight shrinkage since 3 months ago, so we know Opdivo is still doing it's job and kicking cancer's ass.

Now, the not so good news.  The CT scans showed a mass in my bladder.  My oncologist stated she highly doubts it is spread from my lung because that is very rare.  However, there is the possibility it is a 2nd cancer - just my luck.  

She wanted me to see a Urologist ASAP but unfortunately they were booked until May 24th.  She stressed I should call periodically and see if they have cancellations.  Lucky for me, I called today and they had an opening.

The Urologist and I went over my scans.  He stated we have to do a cystoscopy so he can look at it and get a biopsy.  We have scheduled that for next Wednesday.  He will be able to tell me at that time if it indeed is a 2nd cancer.  He was very compassionate, concerned and explained things in detail.  He told me he cannot make an educated guess without a biopsy but the way it looks makes him pessimistic of the final diagnosis. The fact that I've never had a bladder infection or kidney infection is another bad sign.  My kidneys and bladder work great.

As cancer patients, we all know, no one ever rushes anything.  We wait and we wait.  What alarms me this time is his push to his staff that this needs to be done "tomorrow."  That is exactly what he told his staff while I was there.

I will keep you all informed going forward  I apologize for not answering your questions but I needed time to tell all 7 of my children - that took an entire day :)

I love you all for all the support your provide.  The past two days have proven I have many people behind me giving me the strength to continue the big fight.  During my mother's cancer fight in the early 80's, she always said, "God only gives you what you can handle."  All I can say mommie is - enough already!

Say an extra prayer for me.