Sunday, November 19, 2017


As we grow up and become parents, friends, etc., we know life doesn't last forever.  We don't know when it will happen, but it "happens to all of us."  Well, with a Lung Cancer diagnosis, we realistically open our eyes and ears and know that end may come much quicker than we thought.  That's when we fight with a flame we never knew we had inside of us.

This fight is also about awareness.  How many of us knew what we know now when we were diagnosed?  Now is the time to spread awareness.  This fight, our treatment, forces us to hold close what is important, love what is dear, and do what is love.  This has forced me to think about my own mortality.  

If God wants me before I can become an old lady with a cane, slippers and my robe, then I want to do as much as I can to help others before my time is up.  Our family has participated and created many community projects.

Now, while I am feeling well, I have decided what I would like to do as another way spread lung cancer awareness is donate my wedding dress in the name of Lung Cancer Awareness.  I have found an organization that takes "cleaned" wedding  dresses and with a team of seamstresses across the country, they create gowns to be worn by stillborn babies and preemie babies who crossed that bridge with the others.  Parents should never have to experience the loss of a child, but in this world, we know it happens too often.  "Angel Gowns" have a team of volunteers who meet monthly and use wedding gowns to create gowns for the babies to be buried in.  I, as a mother, cannot imagine being told to go home and pick something out.

PLEASE consider joining me in making one thing in these parents lives, a bit more bearable. 

If you would like to participate, please contact me (contact form is on right side of my blog).  Below are the details:

  • dress must have been cleaned
  • dress is mailed at your expense
  • PLEASE consider adding a roll 3/8 or 5/8 white satin ribbon to help make the angel
  • if there is a portion of the dress you'd like to keep, please use scissors and cut it off before mailing the dress
  • Add a note with your name, date of your wedding and mention your donation is help spread lung cancer awareness
This is NOT a 501(c)3, so your donation will not be tax deductible.

I hope to hear from many of you.  God Bless and Have a Wonderful Thanksgiving.

Below is a picture of my wedding gown that I will be mailing.  The second picture is a sample of the Angel Gowns that are made from our dresses.

p.s.  they accept flower girl white dresses as well 

Monday, November 6, 2017


I have always been honest in all of my writings.  Whether it's for my blog, Lungevity or, I say the good with the bad.  So here is what I know and don't know.

As you know from reading my blog, I am preparing for my next TURBT this Thursday, Nov. 9th.  I had a hard time with the last two (which had one tumor) so this time knowing I have 5 plus, I'm extremely nervous.

I'm nervous.  Take that with a grain of salt.  Doc chose to switch my medications last week.  She wants me to take Klonopin instead of Xanax.  Ok, I thought.  Let's try it.  I took it for 3 days. NO. NO. AND NO.  On day 3 and 4, I was a basketcase.  Hands shaking, voice shaking, crying if I couldn't find the new roll of toilet paper.  I was a mess.  I couldn't stop thinking, "I have cancer.  I'm going to die."  This is what we say at initial diagnosis.  Not four years in.  So I called my doctor on call and he said to immediately stop taking new stuff and go back to old until I talk to my doctor this week.  That phone call took place yesterday and I can't begin to tell you how much better I feel.

Now on to the lungs.  My latest CT scan does show several minor/tiny changes.  Multiple lung nodules and lymph nodes are stable - no change.  One nodule grew by 4mm.  And a new one has appeared. 3mm.

Bottom line my doctor is ecstatic about my lungs....still.  She feels since I have tolerated Opdivo for so well for so long that I am the 1% of patients that make it to/past 5 years.  (My 4 year canserversary is this January).  She feels even though there are very minor changes, the other nodules staying the same proves to her Opdivo is still working and we will continue it.  She is cautious because of new growth, but it is so small we will simply watch it during my every 3 month scans. She specifically said to me, "even with these changes I am no where near saying we are at the end of the road."  This is a great thing!

The lung scans also show I have "moderate diverticulitis."  This may explain my stomach issues and a diet change can possibly change this.

So overall, good scans.  I say that lightly because the day I found out about the tiny growth, was one of the days on the new medications, so I was a basketcase.  Now that I'm back on my original, I'm ok with this - no growth means I'm still winning. As I said earlier, "I have cancer  I'm going to fight this monster and kick its ass."

(P.S.  Nurses were filming the entire thing while laughing hysterically.  The poor woman in the beginning in the red vest was a volunteer and had NO idea what was going on)
The volunteer must have worked the front desk because as we were exiting the building she started yelling to her co-workers, THERE SHE IS!!